So before I talk about anything fertility-related, I really, really, REALLY need to share with you what happened to me last night. So G. and I were out yesterday and decided to get some pizza from this place that we’d heard was really good. I had a glass of wine before the pizza arrived and I was already loopy. First of all, as someone who is pretty much constantly trying to get pregnant, I rarely drink. And when I do drink, I’m pleasantly drunk after two glasses of wine. Which is what I had last night. After the first glass, I started to get a little… well, horny is the best word to describe it. And as I’d just ovulated on Friday, I think the hormonal effects of that probably added to that. So we ate our pizza and headed out to the car (which G. was saying he was worried he was going to have to carry me out to as he wasn’t sure I could walk straight). Once in the car, I told G. that if we were going to make love (which I really wanted to do) we had to stop and buy some condoms because there was still a chance I could get pregnant and we have to wait until after my HSG to try again.
So as we’re driving to the drug store near our house, G., who was sober, says, “I’m not going in to buy condoms.” “No problem,” I probably slurred, “I’ll just run in and get them. I don’t care.” We got to the drug store and I walked in and over to the condoms where I grabbed a box. They were $2.99 and I didn’t have cash and I wasn’t sure if they had a minimum amount for card use, so I figured I’d grab some shampoo, too, since we did need some. I grabbed the shampoo and my condoms and headed to the checkout and got in line. “Hey, Ellie,” I heard. I looked up and froze. It was my boss. My BOSS!!! The only thing I was thinking was “ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod.” There I am, drunk and buying condoms and my frickin’ boss is in line ahead of me. I just kind of mumbled hi and that I was going to get some candy, and wandered over to the candy across from the checkout, trying to play it cool and not let him notice that I’m drunk and praying he didn’t see the condoms in my hand. I tried to hide them in my hand between the shampoo and the Starburst package I randomly grabbed before I headed back to the line. He made some comment about the weather I think I responded appropriately, but I have no idea. He paid and left and I said, “See you Monday,” I think. Then I paid and actually RAN, laughing hysterically, out to the car.
I still can’t believe that that actually happened. I called my best friend on the way home to tell her the story because I just had to tell someone. The thing is, my boss is the type of guy who wouldn’t care if I was drunk. When I see him tomorrow, I’m just going to say that I was embarrassed that he saw me drunk (because there’s no doubt he could tell I was drunk) so that’s why I was acting a little weird. We’ll see if he mentions anything about seeing any condoms. I hope not.
So, yeah. About the HSG. I got my period the Thursday before Thanksgiving and called my doctor’s office to let them know so we could schedule the HSG. The nurse calls me back and says that the only days they can do the HSG are on days 8-10 of my cycle, which, of course, will fall over Thanksgiving, when they’re not open. So I suggest we do it on day 11, the Monday after Thanksgiving, but she says they won’t because it falls too close to ovulation and if I’m pregnant it could disturb the pregnancy. I said, quite reasonably, that I wasn’t going to risk getting pregnant until after I had the HSG because I don’t want to have a 6th miscarriage if there’s something wrong with my uterus. But she was firm about the risk and I was so confused. Do they really think that I’m that stupid, that I don’t know how pregnancy happens and I can’t figure out how to avoid it? Obviously I do, even when drunk. 🙂 So I suggested she talk to the doctor and let me know what he says and she agreed.
An hour or two later she called back and said that the doctor didn’t think that I really had my period. He said that he felt it was bleeding caused my by hCG levels being back down to normal. I mentioned that I’d had fertile cervical fluid two weeks before, but she dismissed it. I was so pissed off. Do all doctors treat their patients like they’re stupid? I’ve been charting my temps and cervical fluid for three years. I know pretty well what’s going on with my body. I finally realized that I wasn’t going to get anywhere so I gave up. I just ovulated Friday, so days 8-10 of my next cycle should be good and will fall right after Christmas. I’ll probably call tomorrow to see if they’ll schedule it because my luteal phase is always 13 or 14 days. We’ll see if they believe me.
I just don’t get why they treat me like some stupid woman who doesn’t know her own body. Why is that? Am I the only one who has these problems with their doctors? It’s so annoying and frustrating. One of the benefits of having a baby will be needing to deal with these people less.
Once Upon Happily Ever After 